Thursday, September 18, 2008

How Dragonfly Fine Designs was Born

I think even before I had children, I loved walking around the baby sections at the stores. I don't know, there is something about baby items and clothing that is so precious. Maybe because they are so small and cute. And it is so hard to fathom that you were once a baby, and that you could have gotten away with wearing ruffled bloomers or a shirt that said, "I love dirt". I guess that is the beauty of baby clothes.

My husband and I struggled to have children, and we were over the moon thrilled when I found out I was pregnant in 2005. I was so excited to just be pregnant, and most importantly that I was going to be a mom. I tried to enjoy every second of being pregnant, which sometimes was hard when I felt so sick that I couldn't get out of bed. I loved registering, and looking at all the gadgets and fun things out there. My mother was in awe of all the new things that had developed a good twenty years after she had children.

I think when I found out I was having a boy, I started going into "mommy mode". I started sewing for my son, and thinking about what can I make for him next. I wanted to make him outfits, blankets, bibs, hats, it was insane how obsessed I became.

After he was born, it was a big adjustment for me. I guess I didn't realize how different my life would be. I thought I was prepared but I totally wasn't. I felt like I couldn't take anytime for myself, so the things I was doing before like sewing, going out with friends, fell kind of by the waste side. I worked full time, but my husband and I decided together, that once our little boy arrived I would be a stay at home mom. I thought staying home was going to be a piece of cake, boy was I wrong. I always worked, and not working outside the home was tough for me. Being a new mother I felt kind of isolated. My son was born in November so I didn't really take him out much, in fear of him catching something. So I was home a lot. I felt kind of disconnected from the world. He was NOT a good sleeper, so I was adjusting to getting little or no sleep. I thought loving him, and wanting him so bad would be enough to get me through being a new mother, quickly I discovered that wasn't the case for me. I need a creative outlet, I needed other people around, and most importantly I needed time for myself. So I started scrapbooking, joined a MOMS club, and took some sewing classes. I was creating some "me" time again. I started learning that being a mother was just one piece of the puzzle to my make up. It might be a huge piece of the puzzle, but there are other pieces that are just screaming to be put together.

So when my daughter was born in 2008, I said to myself that I wasn't going to make the same mistake twice. I took time for myself, and I continued doing the things I loved. Like designing and creating. Also, I am more of a relaxed mother. I go with the flow more. I stress less. There is less of a schedule. And that is okay. I am okay. And my children are okay. And most importantly happy.

So when I turned the big 3-0 I decided I was going to do what I always dreamed of doing, open my own shop. I put my fears and anxieties aside and I did it. And in May 2008 Dragonfly Fine Designs was born.

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